Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Conversations with the Menace

Spending most of my 45 years in this body and mind, I have found that I am not alone in here. There seems to be a "voice" that continually argues with me. Now please understand, I am completely "sane" by any definition of the word. At least, I have not been diagnosed with a disorder of any sort other than the modern adult ADHD that seems to be all the rage now. But, I do confess, the meds are helping me focus and I can actually get things done.

So, I need to speak of the Menace. This is the voice within that tells me (and I believe he exists in everyone) to do, or not to do. Some may say this voice is Satan, the devil, or some other evil entity that only exists within those that believe in such horseshit. I, on the other hand think that the menace is an alter ego, or a bad program running in the background that could have possibly come from some former bad experience or something of the sort.

Example #1 I have plenty of money in the bank right now, but for some strange reason, I don't go over to my stack of bills, pick them up, sort them, write out the checks and send them. Why? Every time I approach this stack of dis-order, something stops me..."The Menace" What the hell is that about. Just walk over, pick up the goddamn bills, write the checks and be done with it....

Example #2 I am in love with a very beautiful woman. She totally turns me on. We've been seeing each other for over a year, but I think she is going to dump me. HOWEVER, I have been separated from my wife for well over a year, built my own house, moved into the house and guess what? Haven't filed the divorce papers yet.... Why? The fucking Menace again...

Who of you have such a menace within??????

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